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If you need help figuring out your love language, please read my previous post What is your primary language?

Those of us who respond to the love language Words of Affirmation as one of our primary languages, we love to hear positive, encouraging words.  In my opinion, those of us who have Words of Affirmation as their primary love language are most affected by words.  As in the Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz Jr.,  we need to understand that our words have the power to create and destroy. For those of us who feel loved through words, it is easy to become hurt by what people intentionally or carelessly say that is on the destructive side.  Words are used to encourage, comfort, and love.  Words are also used to abuse, hurt, and hate.  This goes for what we speak and since we are talking about self care, how we think.

I remember hearing the quote by Napoleon Hill “You become what you think about.”  The more we have doubt and have negative thoughts the more we believe these thoughts to be reality and become them.  The same thing happens when we have positive thoughts and positive self talk.  If we are our own cheerleader, our own coach, and our own encourager, we also make those thoughts a reality.

Words of Affirmation is another love language that takes extra effort and a routine.  If you haven’t yet, you should read my article on routines, Hello Routine, my old Friend.  Setting aside time in our routine to spend with and on ourselves, makes sure that we love on ourselves daily.

Music: Over the years we have all related and communicated using songs and lyrics.  Music not only communicates to the world around us how we feel, but also communicates to our brains how to feel.  Playing upbeat music with a positive message will reinforce feelings that you enjoy.  There have been many times I belted out Adele songs in my car, and this has helped me to communicate and release my sadness or frustration into the atmosphere.  I think we sometimes need that, but don’t stay there.  Bring it back up and carry it throughout the day.

Gratitude Journals:  I love journaling, especially gratitude journals.  Thinking about and then writing down the things we are grateful for at the end of our day helps us to feel secure and confident about our place in life.  The more things we are grateful for the more we will notice them and the more there will be.  Gratitude also inspires us to keep pushing to that next goal to take risks and to accomplish more that we can be grateful for.

Encouraging Friends: Having friends that are encouraging and supportive help feed our Words love language.  Being a part of an uplifting circle of friends where we can receive and offer our friends love and support.   Sometimes these people come to us as family members and sometimes people who become as close as siblings.  Many times we only need a compassionate ear to listen and encourage us to continue push forward to our goals.

Notes: Leave yourself encouraging notes.  Not just a grocery list or a reminder to run an errand, but little love notes.  Print out affirmations or poems you love and hang them where you see them everyday.  Keep refreshing your poems and notes weekly or monthly to keep the encouragement going. I am known to have little sticky notes on the mirror in the bathroom or attached to the frame of my monitor so then I can see them everyday.  These “I love you because”  sticky notes are great for leaving little love notes for myself.

Mirror Work: Mirror work is a technique taught by the late Louise Hay.  Louise Hay believed that our words and affirmations that we speak to and over ourselves can change and heal our minds, our bodies, our spirit, and our lives.  Using positive affirmations and expressing your love for yourself  you can achieve a healthy relationship with yourself.   You can click here to request the free e-book.  Mirror work helps us to reprogram our brains to see ourselves as the wonderful and beautiful people that we are and were created to be.

I feel that I must reiterate that words have immense power to create or destroy.  Words are very important in our daily lives.  We must use them wisely to convey our needs, to express our emotions, and to lift each other up.  If you have found other techniques that have worked for you, please share with us below.  Have a fantastic Day!